I hung my hat up
On a peg
And slipped out of my coat

I pulled my pants off
Both my legs
And flung them off the boat

In just a t-shirt
And my briefs
I dove into the moat

My pants distracted
Both the sharks
While I retrieved the tote

Inside I found six
Mermaid eggs
Which I fed to the goat

He didn’t like them
Very much
So the Queen had me beheaded and stole my briefs and fed my body to the sharks

I wanted to write you a poem
A love poem full of beautiful words
Words like ‘verily’ and ‘throes’ and ‘forevermore’

I wanted to write you a poem
A poem that I could dedicate to you when it was printed
In some kind of ‘collection’ or ‘anthology’ or ’memoir’

I wanted to write you a poem
The kind of poem that English professors would write about
Using words like ’soulful’ and ’evoke’ and ’counterpoint’

I wanted to write you a poem
So I did
But it wasn’t any good, so I deleted it
I just want you know that I tried

Twelve little bunnies hopped out of a hole
Some white ones and orange ones, some brown and some black
I thought they were cute, so I took them all home
They peed on my couch, so I took them all back

Isn’t it strange
That my words
Seem to come
In groups
Of three
Oh wait
Now it’s two
Never mind
That was odd
Once three
Then two
Then back
I’m so lost
Why can’t poems
Ever be normal?

My bellybutton’s wonderful
It’s circled ‘round with hair
I touch it every now and then
To make sure it’s still there

If I ever lost it
I’d hold myself and cry
‘Cause life without a button
Is like life without a sky

Yes, life without my button
Would certainly be glum
But even if my button leaves
At least I’ll have my bum