This morning when I stumbled into my bathroom, I found a bunch of facial hair clippings in the sink. You know what I mean: the really fine, tiny bits of hair that come off your face when you use an electric razor.

I use an electric razor. But I never dumped any of the clippings in the sink. That’s a good way to clog the pipes.

I thought it was possible that I had shaved over the sink yesterday and that some of the clippings had “spilled” out of the shaver because it was full and needed to be emptied. So I shaved over the sink in an attempt to replicate the situation and see if any hair would spill out.

None did. My shaver didn’t even need to be emptied that badly.

So I don’t know how that hair got into my sink. Maybe someone broke into my house overnight and shaved themselves into my sink. Some kind of psycho lunatic nutjob.

Weird.

Was it you? It was you, wasn’t it. Admit it. I know your game. Weirdo.